A Good Day

So it's been awhile since I've posted...so much has happened! Quick recap: I went into labor on Sunday (Nov 21) and, after a few false alarms, our beautiful baby finally made her appearance early Wednesday morning (Nov 24). I've been sequestered in our home ever since...well, it feels like it anyway!

I keep thinking, no one ever tells you just how hard these first few weeks (months) can be! I mean, they tell you that being a mother is the hardest job in the world, but I guess I always assumed that was hyperbole. Apparently not.

I didn't have a ton of physical pain after giving birth (thankfully), so I feel very lucky in that regard. But the lack of sleep...that's what's been killing me. I could handle anything else if I could only get some sleep! She always seems to be hungry, or need something...and if I can't figure out what that is, I feel like a total failure for her. Today, for the first time in eight weeks, I'm actually not completely exhausted...and I think it's because I've gotten her to nap twice (twice, can you believe it?!?), so she's in a better mood. Would that every day could be like this!!

Hopefully, now that we're at eight weeks, things will begin to get a little (!!) easier and I'll have more time to write here. With any luck, I can share some of my experiences to help other new moms with some challenges they might be going through...to make things a little easier for them, too.

Until then...it's all about the baby steps!

Grateful

Last night, I was reminded just how wonderful it is to have good friends in your life...no matter how far away they may be.

Just before 8pm, my hubby started pestering me to check my emails...under the guise of, "My sister copied you on something, did you get it?" I kept refreshing, to no avail...there was nothing new. After a few minutes of this, I started to get worried...but he wouldn't give me anymore hints.

Then all of a sudden, a mysterious email popped up in my Inbox, from a good friend of mine...

IT'S A BABY SHOWER FOR SPUD!

We thought you needed a baby shower so this was the only way we could do it - on-line!

So, start opening presents and show us what Spud got!

Compassion

In reading a quote from the Dalai Lama today (copied at the bottom of this blog), I started thinking about compassion. For some people, it comes naturally; for others, it's like speaking a foreign language. I used to think (perhaps naively) that all people aspired to be more compassionate towards others. Now, I'm more inclined to think the thought never even shows up on some people's radar screens.

You may have noticed I haven't written anything in the past few days...it's not for lack of happenings or realizations. In fact, the opposite is true. I'm just not sure I'm ready to share them yet, and my poker face has never been one of my strong points.

So for now, suffice to say that I agree with the Dalai Lama. And that I think the world would be a better place if everyone thought a little more about others, and a little less about themselves.

Developing genuine compassion for our loved ones is the obvious and appropriate place to start in our spiritual practice. The impact our actions have on our close ones will generally be much greater than on others, and therefore our responsibilities toward them are greater. Yet we need to recognize that, ultimately, there are no grounds for discriminating in their favor: all beings equally deserve our compassion.

My bump didn't lower my IQ

Basic chivalry/courtesy is great. I love seeing a teenager give up his seat on the bus for the elderly, or someone in a suit pausing to hold the door - even when they're obviously in a rush (I do have southern family, after all). Lately, however, I've begun to notice a change in people's attitudes towards me...once they realize I'm pregnant.

I had seen articles and books that said people (even strangers?) tend to get over-involved in pregnant women's business -- touching stomachs (eww!), giving unsolicited advice, telling horror stories about their own childbirth experiences, playing up the risks that exist during pregnancy (who knew deli meats were so dangerous?!).

I guess I just didn't realize these same people would automatically assume I became an idiot the moment the pregnancy test came back positive. (There's a great article from The Times on this subject as well, written by Kate Johnson a few years ago: Hey, I’m pregnant, not stupid.)

A quiet thing

Yesterday morning, I got to enjoy some rare moments of peace and quiet, before (most of) the rest of the house woke up. The puppy and I took a walk outside, just as pink and purple streaks were stretching across the sky, while hubby and the rest of our furkids snoozed inside. It was blissful.

It's been nearly a year since we moved to our new place in the country, and I'm just as pleasantly surprised by the stillness and tranquility now as I was then.


When we got this house, I must admit to being a little hesitant about moving so far away from the city. I'd lived in (or within about 10 miles of) NYC for 15 years by that point, so I had gotten used to a lot of conveniences. But my grandmother once told me, "Everyone should live in New York at least once...just don't stay there too long," and I think she was right. It was time for me to move on. I was ready.

Don't eat the whole banana leaf

My hubby uses this phrase all the time, particularly when I start to feel overwhelmed by the amount of things I need/want to get done. See, I have a habit of trying to "eat the whole banana leaf" all at once. If you've ever seen one, you'll understand what I mean....

(Those leaves can grow almost nine feet long and two feet wide. Talk about a mouthful!!)

What's important to you?

Compared to the amount of work I used to get done in a given day, I've become a lazy shadow of my former self. However, that's been kind of wonderful for me (in a strange way), because it's allowed me more time and freedom to think about things I've put off...in some cases, for years. I love coming up with grand plans and/or project ideas, but never seem to find time to follow through on them. My hubby is always telling me I deserve a break -- after all, I've been working hard (and consistently) for nearly 25 years now -- but I struggle to feel worthy.

With all the recent changes in my life, that's begun to change as well -- albeit in baby steps.